midnight.fever

Thursday, November 30, 2006

life isn't as beautiful at it seems..maybe to me at tis point of time.
u have many frens..but how many are actually very close to u.
how many of them are whom u met as frens are now hu u call ur bro's or sis's.
the ppl who u can share ur problems with..the person hu will advice u..the person hu will go thru thick and thin with u..a true fren. its not easy to find one. perhaps almost impossible to find one. even married couples..im sure alot of them dun share their innermost probs and troubles. cos their spouse might not share the same sentiments and are not able to sympathise with u. sometimes i really wish tat God wud appear in the form as a person..a person who u can trust and confide in. maybe im jus to secretive and never open up about my innermost thoughts. its lyk the case of nobody-being-there-for-you kind of feeling. whenever u need sum1 to tok to..to pour your heart out..there's no1. prayin somehow doesnt really help for me. maybe its becos i want some1 hu wud respond. and not go all the way to church to find an answer or waiting until when ur asleep at nite for God to respond to your troubles. its lyk..theres no1 to call. no1 to tok to when u want to. i dno, i dun share my innermost thoughts to even my "bros". perhaps its jus me being to secretive. i dun really trust ppl easily. as in TRUST. trustin ppl to share and keep my thoughts..not easy for me. not easy for me to share them with a person. i've never done so actually..yeah. hoping for sum1 hu can fulfil tat..but guess its near impossible. the possiblility of finding tat person to fill tat criteria..almost zero i guess.

latetimes.

@12:32 pm

sometimes i wonder..issit good to carry on with the way i act or behave..
maybe some ppl can't stand it but they dun say for the sake of not creating any misunderstandings..but oso i act tis way in the hope tat ppl might not find me so sensitive.
maybe i still hav tat lil part of sensitivity in me..but guess its more or less covered up by the way i act. but with the way im acting some ppl may find it irritating..
change for ppl or stay true to yourself? i dno. dammit.

today had training. ran a longer and much tougher route. i sucked.
bloody stitch..and my lousy running.
where has the part of me tat tells me to keep on running and put the next foot forward..the part that asked me to stay determined and not stop running and walk like a fool. dammit.

latetimes.

@11:45 am

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

im bored.

28th nov is/was my dad's birthday..and lenny din get him anything.
and i feel sucky. im gna buy him one trw. any1 can/wna come?
i better buy trw lah. lol.

today din got for training cos we goin to turf city and i woke up at 7am. too late already..cos trackers meetin at 7.30 at AMK interchange. actually i think can make it one..tho wud be a lil late. but i always take my time one. so confirm late. so in the end i din go..and i CONTINUED SLEEPING!! sleeping the best feeling man. haha. then i woke up bout 2.48pm. hahaha. not bad eh. =)

din do anything special today. stayed at home all day. then 5.30 went to run with cuz..woo it was a nice run lah. haha. guess we both pushed ourselves not to give up. each of our presense was enuf to push each other. haha. we're gna run together many more times! hahaha.
lenny better improve his running man. woo. but my knee..its back. swollen more then ever. lol. i felt the pressure and small pain after dinner. tat was enuf to make me think of my leg. doctor said it will stay tis way until i hit approx 18 yrs..when the leg bone will(hopefully) fuse together.
kinda sian to think abt it actually..haha. lenny's bored u see..so hie's crappin bout his leg. lol.

now its 12.17am..29th november. i got my books. sum1 study with me k? study grp better start soon(hx u readin??)! hahaha.

ok cya! pehh

latetimes.

@12:04 am